Why I am Wonderful

Sometimes, or in my case often, we need to take a step back and realize that we are wonderful human beings. I can make lists of things that I find fault with myself.

I am not beautiful
I make mistakes
I am socially awkward
I am not perfect
Sometimes I yell at my kids
Sometimes when my kids are having meltdowns I fantasize about running far, far away.
There is someone who is always smarter at me.

It is easy to come up with the negative. It is not so easy to realize that there is a lot of positive about myself as well. I am an amazing human being.

This morning I woke up and got out of bed. That is amazing of itself. I got myself clean and ready for the day. I put on a power suit since it was a very professional day at the office.

I got my 13 year old son up and helped him get ready. I calmly dealt with his tantrum. I did not respond when he flung my bed apart and I directed him and contained him in his room without one person getting hit - although the walks too a few kicks. I did this without once raising my voice.

I also helped my other two girls get ready (at the same time as containing my son). I helped them navigate their clothes, fed them, and walked out of the house with everything that they needed for the day. The night prior I had very planner signed, homework finished, and paper looked out. I am amazing.

I played car pool to the before school programs and made it into work thirty minutes early, as usual due to the children's new schedules.

At work I hosted presentations, worked on projects, and kept myself busy and productive.

Tonight I will pick the kids up, bring them back to the house, and feed them. I will deal with their afterschool let down. I will make sure the homework that was suppose to be done at after school is finished. We will make it on time to our Taekwondo class where we will all distress. Then we will head home, make lunches, do chores, and have free time before bed.

Because of all this I am amazing. I am amazing because I get back up and do it all again the next day. I know I will be doing something of the sort a year from now. I navigate medications, therapists, and doctors. I go to IEP meetings, work meetings, and schedule family time. I spend my Sundays baking food for the next week. Before bed I sneak in me time and read. I keep us all sane, and if something is not working I take a step back and figure out how to fix it. Even if that means finding out a way to pay for Taekwondo so that my children learn that hitting is not the answer, and get a place to get rid of a lot of aggression. And as J expressed - feel more like normal children with activities.

There are many things that I am not. Yet there are many more reasons why I am wonderful.